Friday, October 30, 2009

I Give Up

I will never not be alone. I will never be within the norm. I will never change my habits. I will never stop pitying myself. I will never stop feeling. I will never try again. There is no more "one more chance". This is it. In grief for oneself it is easy to realize that giving up is so much harder than trying. Attempt takes bravery, forfeit requires failure.

The acceptance of the failure is what takes courage. There is more valor in loss than there ever could be in triumph. I officially announce my acceptance of failure, my faults, my utter incapability to find what truly makes me happy. The gallantry of defeat is something I will take pride in, realizing that so many are weaker than I because they give into the desire to try again. I stand tall in my decision and will no longer waver.

The pride is one thing to endure, the agony of repeated failure is another.

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